so i was at a party last night and a nice looking man sat next to me. we got to talking and he was pretty funny. then i asked him where he was from. well, as you can imagine, he said he was from delaware.
i made sure to give him an obvious response.
"hi......i'm in delaware. ..." from waynes world.
he laughed a sympathy laugh and said sarcastically, "thanks wayne, i've never gotten that before."
so i asked him if people thought it was funny when they watched the show and he said "yeah the whole theater was like whaaatttttt!" and i was like no. this man did not see waynes world when it came out in theaters. so i was like "that must make you 35." and he was like no....not quite. turns out he's 30.
we kept talking a little bit and that was that until a few minutes later he said "so i'm suddenly becoming aware of my age." and i was like "why, because everyone is acting immature?"
and this was our conversation.
him-"no, because that girl over there just said she was 19."
me-"ha. guess how old i am."
him-"THAT'S how old you are??"
me-"no i said GUESS how old i am."
him-"oh i thought you said thats how old you are, i was going to say..."
me-"heh......heh...."
him-(NOT catching on.) "22?"
me-.."no."
him-"23?"
me-haha.uhhhhNO."
and somehow the subject changed and i never told him that yes indeed, i AM 19. awkward!
Sunday, March 30, 2008
Saturday, March 22, 2008
i miss you. i'm going back home to the west coast.
so i've decided that i want to come home in may and not come back to new york city.
i have been thinking about it since i got here, obviously. I wasn't sure if i'd stay for the summer, do summer school, get the basic certificate, or get the associates. its all been a big jumble and the reasons i wanted to come home two months ago are not the same reasons i want to come home now. its been a really dificult decision, but i think i've made the right one.
no one knows what its like living here, especially being 19 years old. new york city is not glamorous. the streets and subway stations and trains are all dirty, and very smelly. there is a very, very large amount of homeless people, and they are really different from the homeless people in utah. there are so many people. so many people who are worried about getting to where THEY need to be. there are pros to new york. the shopping is great, don't get me wrong. its ridiculous how many good shopping areas there are, expensive or not so much. the eating scenery is also amazing. i have been to like 3 places to eat more than once, everything is always a new experience. also, some of the people are wayyy nice. today me and morgan were wondering where k mart was(i needed a suitcase....haha), so we asked a nice woman. she told us where it was, then let us follow her there. she kept looking to the side of her to see if we were still walking behind her, it was so cute. she took us all the way to k mart and dropped us off. stuff like that happens all the time here. people are surprisingly nice, and very helpful in directing you (though a lot of the time, they are wrong).
it also may sound lame, but being 19 is so so hard being here. I have met one girl who is 19 and she has a fake id and parties everynight. i've met a 20 year old and that is morgan. i love her and we get along really well, but she's moving this week back to idaho. i have met a couple 21 year olds but they live with their parents and are shocked that i came here alone. everyone at school is 40+ and are getting their degree in interior design as a second career. everyone at church is 25+, BYU graduates and really, REALLY proud of themselves for living in THE BIG CITY. everyone thinks that i am a baby, and i really am.
its been such a learning experience living here. i have seen things that i never thought i would. example a. a person last night in the subway dressed in a kkk outift and a paper towel over her? face. i have truly truly been alone here. i've had to grow up pretty fast, and learn how to defend where i'm from and what i believe in. its been really hard. now that i've decided to come home, i am so excited. when i think about breathing in clean air, and seeing fields of grass AND SEEING THE MOUNTAINS, i get so happy. i am really excited for it to get warm here. i'm moving to manhattan today. i'm waiting for my driver....seriously....to come get me in half an hour. i called a car service yesterday to take me and lyndsi to the airport, and became really good friends with this italian man. he gave me his personal number, is helping me move, and told me about his wife and his two daughters. and he had sympathy for my dad for letting me come here. he was also very very angry when i told him that i had to walk home from east new york at 9 oclock on a saturday night.
so i'll be living a block from central park, in a really nice apartment in a great location on the upper west side with really sweet girls from the singles ward. it will be a nice change, and the park will be amazing in the spring and summer! i am going to live it up my last 7 weeks here.
i assume a lot of people will think that i gave up on living out here, and they may think that i never became comfortable, happy, or dependent on myself. none of that is true. i don't like new york, and i see no reason to try to "STICK IT OUT" for 2 more years if i don't like it here. i have become comfortable. i know my way around and feel fine (even when i'm the only white person in the entire subway station! i saw 10 white people all day today! and it was us and the missionaries!! it doesn't matter if yo black or white) riding the subways and navigating. and i am VERY dependent on myself. in my darkest hours (ha.) i've really had to think of how to fix it myself, and how to pick myself up. this is a really personal blog, but i just would like to put this all out here. i told katie on the phone the other night that i know i will be getting crap from my extended family about coming home. i know that they will all assume i gave up on living here, and its really sad that the people i have to worry about most talking crap about me, are my cousins.
to sum it all up, i'm coming home may 10th (i think) and i'm really really happy about it. :)
i have been thinking about it since i got here, obviously. I wasn't sure if i'd stay for the summer, do summer school, get the basic certificate, or get the associates. its all been a big jumble and the reasons i wanted to come home two months ago are not the same reasons i want to come home now. its been a really dificult decision, but i think i've made the right one.
no one knows what its like living here, especially being 19 years old. new york city is not glamorous. the streets and subway stations and trains are all dirty, and very smelly. there is a very, very large amount of homeless people, and they are really different from the homeless people in utah. there are so many people. so many people who are worried about getting to where THEY need to be. there are pros to new york. the shopping is great, don't get me wrong. its ridiculous how many good shopping areas there are, expensive or not so much. the eating scenery is also amazing. i have been to like 3 places to eat more than once, everything is always a new experience. also, some of the people are wayyy nice. today me and morgan were wondering where k mart was(i needed a suitcase....haha), so we asked a nice woman. she told us where it was, then let us follow her there. she kept looking to the side of her to see if we were still walking behind her, it was so cute. she took us all the way to k mart and dropped us off. stuff like that happens all the time here. people are surprisingly nice, and very helpful in directing you (though a lot of the time, they are wrong).
it also may sound lame, but being 19 is so so hard being here. I have met one girl who is 19 and she has a fake id and parties everynight. i've met a 20 year old and that is morgan. i love her and we get along really well, but she's moving this week back to idaho. i have met a couple 21 year olds but they live with their parents and are shocked that i came here alone. everyone at school is 40+ and are getting their degree in interior design as a second career. everyone at church is 25+, BYU graduates and really, REALLY proud of themselves for living in THE BIG CITY. everyone thinks that i am a baby, and i really am.
its been such a learning experience living here. i have seen things that i never thought i would. example a. a person last night in the subway dressed in a kkk outift and a paper towel over her? face. i have truly truly been alone here. i've had to grow up pretty fast, and learn how to defend where i'm from and what i believe in. its been really hard. now that i've decided to come home, i am so excited. when i think about breathing in clean air, and seeing fields of grass AND SEEING THE MOUNTAINS, i get so happy. i am really excited for it to get warm here. i'm moving to manhattan today. i'm waiting for my driver....seriously....to come get me in half an hour. i called a car service yesterday to take me and lyndsi to the airport, and became really good friends with this italian man. he gave me his personal number, is helping me move, and told me about his wife and his two daughters. and he had sympathy for my dad for letting me come here. he was also very very angry when i told him that i had to walk home from east new york at 9 oclock on a saturday night.
so i'll be living a block from central park, in a really nice apartment in a great location on the upper west side with really sweet girls from the singles ward. it will be a nice change, and the park will be amazing in the spring and summer! i am going to live it up my last 7 weeks here.
i assume a lot of people will think that i gave up on living out here, and they may think that i never became comfortable, happy, or dependent on myself. none of that is true. i don't like new york, and i see no reason to try to "STICK IT OUT" for 2 more years if i don't like it here. i have become comfortable. i know my way around and feel fine (even when i'm the only white person in the entire subway station! i saw 10 white people all day today! and it was us and the missionaries!! it doesn't matter if yo black or white) riding the subways and navigating. and i am VERY dependent on myself. in my darkest hours (ha.) i've really had to think of how to fix it myself, and how to pick myself up. this is a really personal blog, but i just would like to put this all out here. i told katie on the phone the other night that i know i will be getting crap from my extended family about coming home. i know that they will all assume i gave up on living here, and its really sad that the people i have to worry about most talking crap about me, are my cousins.
to sum it all up, i'm coming home may 10th (i think) and i'm really really happy about it. :)
Saturday, March 15, 2008
Monday, March 10, 2008
i am the sickest woman.
so i got the job as personal assistant/B. it is ridiculous, the things i do. i hated it the first two days and thought to myself, i don't need this. but when she handed me that 6” x 2-3/4” hand written, no taxes deducted check of 3 digits (hundreds, not thousands, who are we trying to kid) i realized that walking through the rain all day saturday, getting SO SEA SICK in the taxi's, running here and there being so stressed was all worth paying off my macy's bill in the end.
go to long island for the month of august ("its on the beach and there is a pool. not bad." she continually reminds me) or not to go for the month of august.
as much as i love the dough, being told what to do all the time is not fun. and though there are some good compliments here and there and pet names ("hows it goin babe!!?") the unsuccessful missions are too much to handle. i'd say less nanny diaries and more the devil wears prada. you know how scared the girl is when she doesnt get the lady her coffee on time? or when she doesnt even have time to talk to her friends because she's so worried about making her boss happy? mmm yeah, know what thats like.
about the title. i really have had a cough for so. long. over a month and its getting ridiculous. if i'm not coughing up my lungs, i'm weak and shaky. it sucks because when i would get like that in utah i'd have somewhere to sit down, in my car or something. but here i can't sit anywhere. there are no benches in any stores or on any street. there are usually no seats available on the subway either. i'm soo sick of being sick all the time and not having any answers. except the constant head/eye ache is due to the fact that i'm 19 and still have my wisdom teeth, i'm sure. so i can't complain about that too much, but i only have a few more pain pills left. the point is, dad if you are reading this, please send some pills, strong pills, here with lyndsi. and send a dentist too, anything but a grosso one.
go to long island for the month of august ("its on the beach and there is a pool. not bad." she continually reminds me) or not to go for the month of august.
as much as i love the dough, being told what to do all the time is not fun. and though there are some good compliments here and there and pet names ("hows it goin babe!!?") the unsuccessful missions are too much to handle. i'd say less nanny diaries and more the devil wears prada. you know how scared the girl is when she doesnt get the lady her coffee on time? or when she doesnt even have time to talk to her friends because she's so worried about making her boss happy? mmm yeah, know what thats like.
about the title. i really have had a cough for so. long. over a month and its getting ridiculous. if i'm not coughing up my lungs, i'm weak and shaky. it sucks because when i would get like that in utah i'd have somewhere to sit down, in my car or something. but here i can't sit anywhere. there are no benches in any stores or on any street. there are usually no seats available on the subway either. i'm soo sick of being sick all the time and not having any answers. except the constant head/eye ache is due to the fact that i'm 19 and still have my wisdom teeth, i'm sure. so i can't complain about that too much, but i only have a few more pain pills left. the point is, dad if you are reading this, please send some pills, strong pills, here with lyndsi. and send a dentist too, anything but a grosso one.
Monday, March 3, 2008
pros and cons of nyc.
con-s
no men.
everyone is older than me, so they all have stuff to do.
no one has a group of friends. if you make one friend, you really only make one.friend.
they absolutely REFUSE. to split your check. even if you ask them at the begining of the meal. they will not do it.
a lot of places only take cash, and they don't use computers in any of the restaurants, they handwrite all the checks and add the tax.
pro-s
they sell really cute clothes, everywhere.
places are open past 9, usually until about 2.
no men.
since there are so many people, you see really funny stuff all day.
my house costs less to stay at then a hotel, so lots of people are coming to visit.
thugs(eye candy) everywhere.
5 dollar pirated movies that are only in theaters now. and THEY come to YOU. you don't have to seek them out.
no men.
everyone is older than me, so they all have stuff to do.
no one has a group of friends. if you make one friend, you really only make one.friend.
they absolutely REFUSE. to split your check. even if you ask them at the begining of the meal. they will not do it.
a lot of places only take cash, and they don't use computers in any of the restaurants, they handwrite all the checks and add the tax.
pro-s
they sell really cute clothes, everywhere.
places are open past 9, usually until about 2.
no men.
since there are so many people, you see really funny stuff all day.
my house costs less to stay at then a hotel, so lots of people are coming to visit.
thugs(eye candy) everywhere.
5 dollar pirated movies that are only in theaters now. and THEY come to YOU. you don't have to seek them out.
I have writers block.
whats been happening lately.
-visitors. i love loved it and hope they loved it. it made new york not seem so bad.
-school school school and miderms miderms miderms.
-a new "branch" with missionaries. that are ready to end their missions after 2 longs years if you know what i mean.
-more male drama, no surprise.
"You have to promise you won't fall in love with me."
-listening to car alarms all day.
every day.
I am going to memorize the dance exibit does when he hears the car alarm.
-letters from missionaries. "I love you AJ and I know a lot of other people do too. Thank you for being such a good friend and always being there for me." love jake, i didn't need to read that as bad as i did last night when i got his letter. love it.
-finding a place to live...and a job. I might go do the personal assistant thing today even though its short notice and i'm wearing shorts....................................................that could prove to be a problem.
-visitors. i love loved it and hope they loved it. it made new york not seem so bad.
-school school school and miderms miderms miderms.
-a new "branch" with missionaries. that are ready to end their missions after 2 longs years if you know what i mean.
-more male drama, no surprise.
"You have to promise you won't fall in love with me."
-listening to car alarms all day.
every day.
I am going to memorize the dance exibit does when he hears the car alarm.
-letters from missionaries. "I love you AJ and I know a lot of other people do too. Thank you for being such a good friend and always being there for me." love jake, i didn't need to read that as bad as i did last night when i got his letter. love it.
-finding a place to live...and a job. I might go do the personal assistant thing today even though its short notice and i'm wearing shorts....................................................that could prove to be a problem.
a million little pieces.
"The first time I saw you, my heart fell. The second time I saw you, my heart fell. The third time fourth time fifth time and every time since, my heart has fallen.
You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. Your hair, your eyes, your lips, your body that you haven't grown into, the way you walk, smile, laugh, the way your cheeks drop when you're mad or upset, the way you drag your feet when you're tired. Every single thing about you is beautiful.
When I see you the World stops. It stops and all that exists for me is you and my eyes staring at you. There's nothing else. No noise, no other people, no thoughts or worries, no yesterday, no tomorrow. The World just stops, and it is a beautiful place, and there is only you. Just you , and my eyes staring at you.
When you're gone, the World starts again, and I don't like it as much. I can live in it, but I don't like it. I just walk around in it and wait to see you again and wait for it to stop again. I love it when it stops. It's the best thing I've ever known or ever felt, the best thing, and that, beautiful Girl, is why I stare at you."
Though James Frey is a liar, that's one of the cutest things I've read.
You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. Your hair, your eyes, your lips, your body that you haven't grown into, the way you walk, smile, laugh, the way your cheeks drop when you're mad or upset, the way you drag your feet when you're tired. Every single thing about you is beautiful.
When I see you the World stops. It stops and all that exists for me is you and my eyes staring at you. There's nothing else. No noise, no other people, no thoughts or worries, no yesterday, no tomorrow. The World just stops, and it is a beautiful place, and there is only you. Just you , and my eyes staring at you.
When you're gone, the World starts again, and I don't like it as much. I can live in it, but I don't like it. I just walk around in it and wait to see you again and wait for it to stop again. I love it when it stops. It's the best thing I've ever known or ever felt, the best thing, and that, beautiful Girl, is why I stare at you."
Though James Frey is a liar, that's one of the cutest things I've read.
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